introductions to my online confessions..

Ok, so I have never 'blogged' before..
to be honest I am a little bit of a techni-phobe!! But I am unhappy with my size, my shape, my level of fittness... as I am sure many other people are.
I have come to realise that my biggest problem is that I cheat, I lie to myself.. 'only this once.. it wont count... I have been good all day, so this is my reward..' all the usual twists and turns that quickly result in my gaining- not losing weight.

I have a great life, I have no excuse for my size and inactivity. I am lazy and embarrassed.

So here it is.. my statistics... (something I never let people know)

height 5'3"
weight 82kg.... or alternatively 12stone 10 (roughly)

I hold myself back from doing things other people my age do, I am embarrassed that I will look silly or something.. which is stupid- but it torments me! Like jumpping into the pool, wearing a swimsuit to get into the pool!! Even doing go-karting (which my lovely fit healthy skinny boyfriend talked my into)

I have spent half the night searching the internet for quick-fix weight loss solutions...

..and seeing as this is supposed to be a confessions page- I guess I should admit that in my lowest moments I do occassionally make myself sick to relieve the guilt I get after eating.
I know that is terrible sounding.. but I do not have an eating disorder... this only happens once or twice a month usually..

And with this blog I am facing up to the fact that I have issues, and by admitting them here on the internet, I am hoping that it will help me stop.
Stop being stupid, and start eating and living healthier!!

So here it goes... a positive attitude to my body and my life!!.. Day zero completed.... Day one- well il keep you posted!